Posted on February 22, 2022
Self-regulation is our ability to gauge our state of mind and emotions, and to keep these under control while we navigate social situations, life roles and relationships. It is a critical skill that allows us to control ourselves, make better choices and manage our emotions when we are angry, upset, sad or worried. Self-regulation is one of the core components of emotional intelligence (self-awareness, self-regulation, internal motivation, empathy and social skills). It is an active and continuous process. When we are better able to understand and address our own emotions and the emotions of others, we are better able to make sense of our environment, adjust to it and pursue our goals.
“Self-regulation is what makes self-control possible, or, in many cases unnecessary.” Stuart Shanker (2016)
Mindfulness is the basic human ability to be fully present, aware of where we are and what we’re doing, and not overly reactive or overwhelmed by what’s going on around us. It encourages active awareness of a person’s own thoughts and feelings and bolsters conscious decisions about how to act instead of doing whatever you feel like doing.
Research has shown the following benefits to practicing mindfulness:
Practicing or learning mindfulness techniques can greatly improve one’s ability to self-regulate.
Co-regulation is a supportive process between a caring, responsive individual and a dysregulated person that promotes the development of self-regulation.
It can occur across the lifespan by providing regulatory support through caring relationships.
By improving our own self-regulation skills, we become more competent colleagues and caregivers. When we see someone in the midst of an emotional storm, keeping ourselves calm and regulated will help them to regulate.
Techniques for Self-Regulation
Check out this worksheet for Emotion Regulation Skill Development to learn more ways to improve your regulation skills!